Saturday, May 23, 2009

When Someone Cares

Just Be Real shared a quote on her blog about how God is always with us. And also how painful it is when someone minimizes our pain and how healing it is when someone sits with you in the dark and sees you through it. In my comment on her blog, I shared how my spiritual director helped me and sat with me through the dark times.
We all need someone like that. We need someone who listens and accepts us unconditionally. It is a gift that is priceless.
Sometimes we are blessed with brief encounters. Someone who enters our lives for just a short period but who still makes a difference. At the time, we may not even realize it, but then we look back and we see.
I do not remember a lot of my teachers when I was growing up but I remember my first grade teacher. She was everything a first grade teacher should be. She was kind and soft spoken and caring.
At the end of the school year, she invited my best friend and me to her house for lunch one day during the summer. We were so excited!!
She didn't invite anyone else from our class. My friend and I (yes, we are still best friends!!) often remember that day and wonder why she only invited us. Did she see my pain and loneliness?
I don't know. I will never know. But I have never forgotten that day. Someone cared enough to make me feel special. Thank you, Lord.


Patricia Singleton said...

What a wonderful memory of your childhood. I have a few that I cherish. I was blessed with teachers who made me want to learn and explore the world around me. I loved school. It was my escape from the abuse at home. In books, I could go anywhere and be anyone. I am still a voracious reader today.

Just Be Real said...

Amen sista, amen!!

Colleen said...

Patricia, I did the same thing with books and I too am a voracious reader. Books were a great escape. What a great gift!

Just Be Real - thanks!

little sparrow , florasita , sticklady , strong tree woman said...

Thanx Colleen , I've written about the comparing or minimizing pain thing too . My own mother made the statement to me one day about a memory I had of my father abusing my sister . She said " oh well that was only one time "
I was just dumbfounded ! It was like a "huh? duh ? did you just hear yourself " moment .
We can never know the effects of an abusive situation on a person or how much it hurt .We are not asked to compare our abuses nor our pain . Abuse for a 2yo child is hurtful and painful no matter be it mental manitpulation or rape .
I have so many wonderful memories as a child from school ,the nieghbourhood , even home . Memories are both good and bad for me life is like that including my abusive times . I now even can see the good in my abusers . I never will beleive any person no matter how horrific ,is all evil , all bad , it is just untrue . My father was given the label sociopath by the pyscologist so this shows how evil he can be .However I do see God in him and how much he is loved . He had choices just like myself .He could have chosen to help children like himself who had been hurt but he didn't he chose to remain and grow in partaking in child rape , manipulation etc. However I also know and can see the why . Have understanding & acceptance . I still see the good through all that . unfortunately abusers do not beleive good is within themselves and are still abusing .
I had my grandmother who tried desperately as best she could to keep our abuser away , etc. and wonderful safe places as a result of her .Throughout the yr she'd send me poems and sticks of juicey fruit gum in my letters ;-)
I had great teachers but then also incredibly abusive teachers . One gr4 teacher despised me . She took out all her frustration on me . I couldn't figure it out as a child the why . We can't process why people are mean to us. I'm just sitting in a classroom . A quiet abused child. Of course now I know the why. She was an abused woman , wife of an alcoholic . She had to go out and teach to support him . Her life was hell . At school she became the abuser . Nothing very odd about that . I don't make excuses for her but I can see the why and have understanding and empathy for her pitiful life . Then I had the 1st grade teacher who was wonderful taught she chose me all the time to read the daily reading .This is where I learned one of my spiritual gifts thru His word ;-)
I spent almost all of 2nd grade looking out the window wanting to be a squirell lol I had a great teacher and our room was right beside a row of huge elms . So I'd watch the squirells running each day tree to tree .
I love my life ;-) good or bad memories I love being me ;-)

mile191 said...

this is beautiful....thanks. Just be real is amazing and influences many of us. thanks for the insight. i appreciate your reflection...

thanks for being there for me..

Colleen said...

mile191 - so glad you stopped by! Thanks for the kind words.

Melody said...

Oh my goodness, its so nice to find a site like this!

When I was abused by my stepfather during highschool no one believed me! All I could do was focus on my studies and my belief that my real dad in heaven was watching out for me.

Thanks so much open words - you are courageous!

Colleen said...

Melody, welcome! Glad you found me. There are many people online these days who talk about their abuse. There is a lot of healing in being able to tell our story, but it has taken me years. I am sorry that you were not believed. That is so painful. Be sure and check out the links on my sidebar for other blogs and other links if you haven't already! God bless!

April_optimist said...

YES! YES! YES! I had a 4th grade teacher like that. What a difference she made in my life. I can truly say she's the reason I'm a writer today.

Colleen said...

April, thanks for sharing about your 4th grade teacher. That is so cool to have that memory and to realize that she had an effect on you like that. My son is a teacher. I told him he could help and influence so many young lives, without even realizing it.