Saturday, August 8, 2009

Denial of the Truth

1st posted 12/18/08

The house I grew up in was a 2 family house. The owners lived on one side and my family lived on the other. We shared the hall and staircase. The house had 3 floors. My bedroom was on the 3rd floor. Hence, the name of my book - The Third Floor Window.
Someone told the landlady recently about my book and that it was about me being sexually abused. She refuses to believe it happened. In fact, she lives in such denial, she even yelled at my mother and hung up on her because my mother was trying to tell her that it really happened!
Obviously the woman is ignorant. And I need to pray for her and people like her. It is people like that who keep people like me from coming out and telling our stories for fear of what will be said about us. Well, I really do not care what she says.
And yet I do care. I care that someone I knew, someone who once said I was the daughter she always wanted, would react to my story this way.
I guess I should pray for her. And I will. But darn it, right now I am a bit peeved. and hurt.
Especially hurt.


Just Be Real said...

Colleen you have ever right to be peeved! I do not know what goes through people's minds when they are in such denial (and the abuse did not even happen to her) for her to be go angry! Then again, you never know what God may be doing in her heart.... let alone yours to pray for her. But, I hear you dear one.

HeartfeltHeartLook said...

Colleen, If I was in your shoes, I'd be hurt too. Especially if she felt like you were like a daughter to her. Maybe she feels so inept because she didn't catch what was happening. When she found out she was in the dark about someone she cared about, maybe it made her feel like part of her life was a lie. Everything wasn't flowers and butterflies. I agree with JBR, God may be working in her heart. The one thing for sure is you know what happened. And what is ~ is what is. You shouldn't have to worry about how someone feels about the truth you had to endure.

I'm looking forward to your book. God bless you Colleen. Stand tall and strong. You are a survivor!

April_optimist said...

When someone does not want to hear the truth, it's because it scares them. Maybe they feel helpless, maybe it triggers something hidden in their memories, maybe....

Whatever it is, it's a shame she couldn't acknowledge what happened to you. All of us out here hear you and know you're telling the truth.

Cindy said...

Bless you, be strong.

Patricia Singleton said...

The fear that others, especially my mom, wouldn't believe me was what kept me silent about the incest for so long. I have found that those who react the strongest to my story often have abuse issues of their own hidden in their past.

Prayers is a good solution. You can't get your neigbor past her denial. Only she can do that. The only thing you can do is pray for her understanding and pray for your own healing. Just because she is in denial doesn't mean that your story is a lie. It isn't. You know your truth whether she wants to hear it or not.

Lisa Marie said...

It is okay to be peeved. As someone you looked to as an authority figure and person to support you, she has definitely let you down. It would be my guess that she was so shocked that denial was just an immediate reaction. All you can do is pray for her to see the truth. I'm glad I found your blog.

Colleen said...

JBR, thank you for hearing me. It really does boggle the mind.

Heartfelt, thanks for your support and understanding! Hope you like the book.

April, thank you for hearing me. Yes, I think you are right that it scared her.

Cindy, thank you for your support and for your visit.

Patricia, you always have such a good way of helping me see things. and thanks for reminding me that I know my truth.

Lisa Marie, I am glad you found my blog, too! Thanks for your comment.

VICKI IN AZ said...

With you on this one for sure.
Sending you hugs.

Colleen said...

Vicki, thanks for the support and hugs!