I think I am suffering from the blues.
My vacation is over. My mother has gone back home. My son is married. I go back to work today.
These are all good reasons to have the blues. There was so much joy and celebration over the last couple of weeks that I think I am just dreading going back to normal. Normal sounds so boring. So routine. So, well, sad.
But there is something to be said about routine, isn't there? There is safety in routine. I know what to expect with routine.
The wedding went well. Joy abounded. The real kind of joy that bubbles up from within. Somewhere in the middle of it I realized that I did not at all feel guilty that my father was not there. I realized that I did not have to worry about my father being there and what to say. I did not have to pretend. I could just enjoy my family. And feel safe.
The photo here is of my son twirling me around the dance floor. And then he twirled my mother around the floor too. There are tons of pictures of this. We just had fun.
I think I will go to work and share my pictures with everyone and relive this beautiful time. Then I will get back to work and my routine.
I think I have "talked" myself out of having the blues. I may be going back to routine but I am not going backwards. There is a difference. Today, life is good.